musicmage

It's like the death of a sunset when the night steals the last golden rays and the earth starved for sunlight feels the cold caress of night creeping upon her. The stars that shine so brightly are a bitter comfort, for they may have beauty, but no warmth to comfort her. The black is endless when it settles fully, Inky and thick it chokes, it blurs, like tears in the corner of your eyes. Yet, the night is only a temporary darkness, like our parting, the sun will rise again and bring us together basking in the warmth of morning and it's brightest star.

The mirror lies. It can't show you what I am what I feel, what I can do, and what I can't. She looks to me her face shining, tear streaked. I'm supposed to have answers, but not the ones she wanted, expected. I'm supposed to be strong. Resilient. Not this crumbling creature before her. I don't know what she sees, for she looks at me with hallow eyes, but I fear that what she saw before, was just a reflection in the glass.

If I bared my soul to you would you falter in the darkness? Would you run screaming from my scars? Or cry at their severity? How long would you search for me in the abyss? Would you loose yourself to find me here? Would you even know me as I am if I appeared before you? Would you listen to the voices there? Would you take their words to heart? Would you hear the real me calling? How many halls are you willing to walk? How many mazes are you willing to tread? How long before you understand? How much of my pain are you willing to bear? How much sorrow can you carry? How long before you know my secrets? How long before you leave?

Keep your hair pulled back it's nice to see your face at last. How many years have we kept our secrets? How long was this burning in your chest as it was in mine? And the silence that slaved us, kept us prisoner, binds us no more. Alas, Though you are no longer a prisoner, I am no longer free.

If silence is golden I can only be second best but my heart still races in my chest. Though I've cried ink upon these pages deep inside the beast still rages, never sated, never done, another battle never won. Stalemate. I can't move my chest is heaving make myself slow down the breathing panic flooding hold on tight close your eyes till it's alright so while the storm howls on with rage I'll be here locked in my cage.

Look me in the eye and deny it. Go on and try it. I'll wait. Search my eyes. Look long and deep. search the shadows as the creep across the dark recesses because anyone's guess is as good as mine when they ask me why. Search the sunbeams, and the broken dreams. Sift through the pieces Left lying in the creases of the folds across my mind field. Watch your step. It's a long way down Look deeper inside Each little cranny I used to hide Each fortress and parapet Way down as deep as you can get in castles and moats and little sail boats skipping across the bay. Look in my eyes and say "You're wrong." Because it's al

There. Right there. That's the look. The one that makes my breath hitch, my face flush, makes me forget everything I wanted to say, or do, or think. Do you know? I wonder if you truly know… Because there, right there, that's the look. The one that makes me believe you, when you tell me I'm beautiful.

I want to make you feel beautiful. I want to let you look through my eyes, see what I see when I'm smiling at you, hear what I'm thinking when I blush. I want to make your heart race. want to feel it pounding 'neath my touch want to make your stomach flutter and your breath quicken. I want to make you smile to make the light to dance in your eyes to make your face to flush from happiness and to ease your pain. I want to make you feel the wonderful things that I feel when I'm with you.

I'm in so much trouble. It wasn't supposed to go like this. I'm not supposed to be a blathering idiot. Any other time, I'm collected, witty, and sure. then I see your name, it flashes across my phone, I feel my face break into a grin, then a smile. A real smile. My eyes are dancing. My heart is beating. My stomach fluttering, All before I look at your words. And then, warmth flares across my cheeks. You called me 'love.' …I'm in so much trouble.

It never gives. It just keeps taking from everyone. "It takes time" they tell me but time is what I fear. The sands are running low and I see the look about him. He knows. I know. They know, but will not say it. The life is leaving his eyes, distant, scared, confused, and still it takes. Takes his thoughts and our hope and our tears and leaves us nothing. Nothing but the beeps of the machines and the doctors with their sympathy.